Watermelon Farmer
A successful watermelon farmer is having some trouble. Some kids keep stealing his crops at night while he sleeping.
To scare them away he makes a sign saying "Caution: One of these watermelons are poisoned".
The next morning, he wakes up to this sign: "Caution: Now two of these watermelons are poisoned".
Funny watermelon jokes
Here you will find great collection of corny, tasty and funny watermelon jokes for all foodies, food lovers and anyone else who likes watermelons. This funny collection of friendly and delicious jokes, riddles and puns about watermelon are clean and safe for everyone. Share these watermelon jokes and other food jokes with your friends so you can laugh out loud together!
Back to FruitBesides watermelon, there should be windmelon, firemelon and earthmelon. The four elemelons.
Did you hear about the fruit who was convicted of armed robbery?Answer: Now he’s a waterfelon.
Did you hear about the watermelon who starred in a telanovella?Answer: It was melondramatic.
Did you hear the joke about the watermelon?Answer: It's pit-iful!
How do you get the water in a watermelon?Answer: Plant it in the spring.
I almost secretly married a watermelon, but I canteloupe.
I once attended the saddest watermelon funeral I’ve ever been to. I gotta say, I’ve never seen anything so meloncholy in my life.
The watermelon plant didn’t like sharing a garden with passion vines; but they started to grow on him.
There was a green house. Inside the green house there was a white house. Inside the white house there was a red house. Inside the red house there were lots of babies. What is it?
They asked how the watermelon farmer felt after winning the lottery; clever bugger said he felt like a melon bucks.
What did the fruit write on his Valentine’s card?Answer: You’re one in a melon!
What did the Watermelon say to the Honey Dew when he asked her to run away and get married?Answer: I would love to, but sorry I cantaloupe.
What did the watermelon say to the honeydew?Answer: I'm sorry baby, we just cantaloupe.
What do you call a fruit that commits crimes?Answer: A waterfelon!
What do you call a serial killer watermelon?Answer: A slaughter melon.
What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa?Answer: Hottermmelon.
What do you do if someone says an onion is the only food that can make them cry?Answer: Throw a watermelon at their face.
What do you get when you cross a watermelon with broccoli?Answer: A melon-coli snack!
What do you get when you slice a watermelon in four pieces?Answer: A quartermelon!
What do you have left over after a pig eats a watermelon?Answer: Pork Rinds!
What is red when you go and green when you stop?Answer: A watermelon.
What was the watermelon’s naughty pick-up line?Answer: Want to see my melons?
When do you go on red and stop on green?Answer: When you are eating a watermelon.
When do you start on red and stop on green?Answer: When you're eating a watermelon!
Why are watermelons such good entrepreneurs?Answer: They always have seed money.
Why are watermelons the saddest fruit?Answer: They get melancholy.
Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?Answer: It wanted to become a watermelon.
Why did the watermelon go crazy?Answer: He lost his rind.
Why do watermelons have such fancy weddings?Answer: Because they cantaloupe!
Why shouldn’t you go into business with a watermelon?Answer: They’re seedy.
Why won’t anyone sit next to a watermelon?Answer: They have a strange smelon.
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