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Funny bottle jokes

Here you will find great collection of corny, tasty and funny bottle jokes for all foodies, food lovers and anyone else who likes bottles. This funny collection of friendly and delicious jokes, riddles and puns about bottle are clean and safe for everyone. Share these bottle jokes and other food jokes with your friends so you can laugh out loud togheter!

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A trooper pulls over a priest and immediately smells alcohol on his breath. The next thing he notices is an empty wine bottle lying on the passenger seat.

“Have you been drinking?” The officer asks.

“Just water,” says the priest.

“Then why do I smell wine?”

The priest looks at the bottle and shouts, “Good Lord! He’s done it again!”
An empty beer bottle walks into a bar and asks to be filled with their finest ale.
The bartender says, "sorry I can't serve you, I can see you're already drunk".
Every time I take a drink from a bottle, it keeps pouring back. Must be spring water.
Going to a recycling party this weekend. The invite said to bring a bottle.
How do you fix a broken bottle of Johnnie Walker?
How many men does it take to open a Budweiser bottle?
I accidentally dropped a full two liter bottle of ginger ale onto my bare foot. Fortunately it was a soft drink.
I have 6 bottles in one hand and 5 bottles In the other. what do i have?
Some kid just threw a bottle of milk and a block of cheese at me. How dairy!
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, “What’s with that guy over there by the wall?”

The clerk says, “Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn’t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative.”

The owner says, “You idiot! You can’t treat a cough with laxatives!”

The clerk says, “Oh yeah? Look at him, he’s afraid to cough!”
Tried to get video of Chuck Norris kicking a cap off a bottle. But the cap fled in terror before it happened.
What did one water bottle ask the other water bottle?
What did the bottle of milk say to the Mexican?
What did the bottle of water say to the spy?
What do you call a bottle of Vodka which is shared by a group of Russian coworkers?

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