If I have to hear any more jokes about soy sauce. I will Kikkoman!
If someone asks for help in the herb garden, you can certainly give advice if you have Thyme.
If tomatoes are fruit...that means ketchup is a smoothie.
If two vegans get in a fight, is it still considered a beef?
If you can drink away your hurt, it must have been champagne.
If you have a pickle problem, the best way is to just dill with it.
Jesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That’s not a miracle. That’s tapas.
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
Last night I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
Life is like an onion. You peel off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.
Life is short, eat the cake.
Like a bear drinking honey from a bee hive, I’m getting really buzzed.
Liquor might not solve all your problems, but it’s worth a shot.
Live every day like it’s taco tuesday.
My girlfriend hated my obsession with Japanese food. Sushi left me.
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