Funny oneliner jokes

I missed the documentary on TV on how they make tomato sauce...I guess I’ll have to watch it on ketch up.

I once attended the saddest watermelon funeral I’ve ever been to. I gotta say, I’ve never seen anything so meloncholy in my life.

I pick fresh vegetables every day. I feed them to my pig and he converts them into bacon.

I planted some root vegetables in my yard. We'll see what turnips.

I pour maple syrup over my essays. Because they're 100% waffle.

I put a lot of basil, parsley, rosemary and thyme in my old Volkswagen Beetle.....it became herby (Herbie).

I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

I thought I was drowning in Sprite, but it was only a Fanta sea.

I tried experimenting with spices the other day. Turned out to be a waste of thyme.

I went to a haunted bed and breakfast in France. That place was giving me the crêpes...

I went to a seafood disco last week! Pulled a mussel!

I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well, it was more of a wrap.

I'm a wine enthusiast. The more wine I drink, the more enthusiastic I get.

If a parsley farmer is sued...could they garnish his wages?

If a turkey runs away, does that make it a chicken?